The letter request:
I want to write a letter to my local IGA to ask them to get more free range eggs in. Sometimes they have them but often they don’t and I’m left having a half an hour debate with myself in front of the egg section whether or not to buy the cage ones on a Saturday morning when I really want to go home and make eggs benedict.
It gets hot in Death Valley National Park, Nevada, USA. Damn hot. So hot you could fry an egg and someone tried this recently. They posted a video of the experiment on You Tube and it went viral, leading to a spout of copycat egg-fryers testing the theory around the National Park until the rangers sent out a loud plea, Dudes! No More Frying Eggs in the Park! It’s getting MESSY!
It gets hot in Fitzroy Crossing too. I’ve got this patch of driveway that I think would be perfect for frying me some Sunday breakfast (sunny side up) only I ain’t got no eggs. That’s where you guys come in. Sometimes you stock organic, free-range eggs, sometimes you don’t. I happen to have an ethical barometer that prevents me from buying eggs from unhappy chooks. It’s a struggling barometer so I will confess to many hours spent staring at the non-free-range cartons in your supermarket, wondering if I should climb off my high horse and delight in the buttery goodness of hollandaise. But then I think of those caged, cramped hens with their beaks, wings and toes clipped, antibiotics and growth-promoter pumped into them and no access to daylight or pasture and it’s avocado on toast, again.
I’ve done a little survey and I’m not the only person wanting a reliable supply of organic free-range eggs (with a ‘Humane Choice’ logo) in this town. We know that eggs from ethically treated chooks cost more and we are willing to pay. I realise that, as you are the nearest supermarket for 260km, I can’t threaten to take my business elsewhere if you don’t meet my needs. I also can’t threaten to egg your house. So I’ll have to take a less hostile, more positive-reinforcement approach and promise you that, should you guarantee a regular supply of organic free-range eggs, you shall receive goodwill from the community and the warm glow of knowing you’ve helped chickens to live humanely.